It has been a while since I last blogged. Haven't really felt like blogging but I guess I'll always keep this blog as it's really nice to read about previous incidents which I may have forgotten with time and how I felt about those incidents then.

I got a sudden urge to read my blog today and after reading, I got another urge to write something on the blog.

This year is almost nearing the end and I have to say that this year is probably one of the most uneventful years for me personally, although lots of stuff happened to the people around me. In a sense, I felt as if I have wasted this year except for the fact that my relationship with the ginggang gals has gotten stronger than ever - the only reason that I feel that this year is worth something.

But I guess this is year where I learnt all about patience - to wait till the time is ripe for me to move on to the next stage in my life. It has been a long wait and it still is. Although there are so many uncontrollable factors, and a lack of commitment and urgency on my part to be honest, I am glad that I have take some small steps towards realising my goal.

I realise that I may not be able to achieve my goal and my confidence is not at its highest after all these years of working, but it's really heartening and encouraging when you have a clear aim of what you want to do going forward. I hope there's a miracle for me, although just waiting for a miracle is stupid. But I can always hope and dream, can't I?

It has been so long that I've blogged that I can't even remember when I wrote the last entry and what I wrote abt. In any case, since it's the last day of the year, I thought it'll be good to write down some of my thoughts...

I'm really blessed and fortunate to have many good friends who make the effort to  celebrate my bday with me, some even went out of their way to specially plan surprises for me. And I truly appreciate all these efforts. Of cos, judging how gd a friend is (shd we even be judging our friends? haha) by this seems superficial but it's always nice when friends make the effort to remember special occasions and make these occasions even more special for you. In contrast, my family did nothing,.. my mum went for a trip, my sis expected me to be on stand-by for her to take me out for a meal, my dad just mentioned my bday in passing... initially my mum even expected me to plan the dinner myself, like ask everyone for their available dates and booked the restnt myself... what? Am i supposed to even pay for the meal myself? I don't know, am I expecting too much? Maybe they think I'm too old for such stuff? Perhaps so, but I'm also still shallow enough to want all these superficial things even at the grand old age of 28 haha!

I think this year is ending on a poor note for me... i have come to realise many things, my inadequacies being one of them. I'm just not gd enough which is why I'm now being left behind. It's a sad realisation to make on the last day of the month and prob people will expect a new year resolution from me now to work harder for the new year and achieve great things but no. I seriously don't see how I can improve things tremendously in the following year, it would probably just go downhill from here - a pessimistic end to a year and a pessimistic start to another. Whatever. I'm giving up.

It's only when I looked at my blog that I realised that i've not written anything for more than 4 mths! And my aim was to write at least once a mth!

Anyways, busy doing research for my London/Paris trip now! First time in Europe... can't wait!